Throwing Shade Won’t Help You Shine

I went on a “wellness” retreat, as so many of us have. I expected to be on a journey of health, wealth and spirituality. I fell for the pretty flyers and videos of the retreat. I needed a getaway from my sticky-fingered kids and hectic unpredictable lifestyle.

Instead, I realized that I was on a gossip sleepover with names I was familiar with and faces that I’ve smiled in before.

I became uneasy and ended up faking a wave of feeling nauseous and made my way home. I deleted them all from every part of my social life.

Later, I heard that I had left because I was pregnant.

In hindsight, that feeling wasn’t faked, being in rooms as such really does make me nauseous.

Who told these women that it’s ok to be mean?

If one more person sucked their teeth and rolled their eyes at me, I swear I was going to…

Continue to love them.

Pray for them.

Encourage them.

Having an attitude is what got us here is the first place, remember?

Yes, in my head I may think of my days before “the born-again entrepreneur” when I was snatching wigs and taking names.

I know that girl is never far away if I need her, but thanks to my commitment to myself, I know I won’t need her any time soon.

I made a commitment to encourage, uplift and motivate women.

I committed to being someone I didn’t have when I was growing up.

In a lot of ways, we as adults are still looking for that person. All along we just need to realize that the woman is inside us. Cliché, right?

So eye rolling won’t do the trick homegirl, I still love you. Gossiping behind my back just makes me pray for you a little bit harder.

In the world of right now, take yourself back to a moment that you got bullied, teased, mocked. For some of you, it wasn’t long ago and the memory may have discouraged you from trying to do something.

It may have stopped you from reaching a goal, from building an empire.

Well, I’m here as a reminder to not become that person. When you don’t know how to handle emotions, you project them onto others.

So, I’m telling you to put on your big girl panties and handle your emotions!

The next time you fix your lips about another woman, let it be a warm smile or words of affirmation.

Speaking life into another woman won’t take from you at all, I know from experience.

Yea boo… You can sit with us.

Image Credit: Sew6 Photography @sew6_photography

We as women already face so many obstacles. Tell me why we are hellbent on BEING another one?

Yes, this is just one article, one person, one voice, but that’s all it takes to light fire.

Bunnie, A Grown Ass Black Woman

#bunnietheblogger #women #throwingshade #gossip #personalgrowth #mindful

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